Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Liberty University: You Won't Find Any Liberty There

Here, I invoke a cliche--but necessary--device.

Liberty, as defined by its Wikipedia entry as:
"Liberty, in modern time, is generally considered a concept of political philosophy and identifies the condition in which an individual has the ability to act according to his or her own will."

If your will is to be oppressed and forced to obey a series of fascist rules, then this facility is full of it. The rest of the population, I'm most certain, disagrees.

The Liberty University Code of Conduct lays down the long dick of Jesus Christ's Offical Moral Code(TM) in two ways: reprimands and fines. I don't know what a repremand is, I guess if you get too many they kick you out of school or make you blow the president. What really tickles my funny bone is the fines; the school is motivating you to follow Christian principles by charging you money. Give to Caesar what is Caesars? Jesus is in on this money shit too.

These punishments are quite imbalanced, though the rules alone are quite absurd. They have curfews, for example. What kind of college has curfews? This one does, and you get one reprimand for every half-hour late past 2 am.

Let's say you attend a required convocation service (Church, it sounds like), and you just stand there and do nothing because you have a headache, or maybe you're on your period and feel like letting God know he fucked up this time of month. That's 4 reprimands and a $10 fine.

Having a shitty day? Want a smoke? Want to go to a dance? Both of those are 6 reprimands and a $25 fine.

Say you want to rally on campus to protest how much the place sucks? Maybe watch a porno because they've explicitly banned sex? That's 12 reprimands and a $50 fine.

What if I want to say "fuck this shit? This is fucking bullshit!" 12-18 reprimands and a "corresponding" fine, depending on how much money John McCain's campaign needs this week.

Gotta get naked? "Any state of undress" is a $250 fine. I guess there's no showering at Liberty! That place's gotta smell like BO.

Now here's the real kicker--witchcraft, drinking, abortion, immorality, spending the night with a person of the opposite sex, and death threats. These all bare 30 reprimands and a $500 fine. The horrors of drinking and witchcraft!

What is most infuriating about all this mess is the fact that a lot poor sods don't choose to go to school here; their parents do. After all, their parents are paying for it, what other choice do they have? Sure, they're 18, they can act independently, but I doubt they've been raised in a manner to allow them to, a manner that gives them the gut and the gonads to strike out and say, "fuck this." This is a bunch of people who've put up with shit like this their entire lives and now have not the courage to change it.

This is where the soul of the poor gay kid from a Christian town goes to die.

This is where the soul of the youth goes to die.

This is where my peers and their minds go to die in my eyes.

4 Comments:

Blogger Darren said...

This post made my day.

Friday, May 30, 2008 5:07:00 PM  
Blogger The Emperor of the Moon said...

haha, thanks man

Saturday, May 31, 2008 10:17:00 AM  
Anonymous Dnasty said...

i'm a freshman at Liberty right now. you couldn't be more fucking right on fucking point.

Friday, September 18, 2009 9:42:00 PM  
Blogger The Emperor of the Moon said...

"you couldn't be more fucking right on fucking point"

that is true liberty

Sunday, September 20, 2009 3:16:00 AM  

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