Tuesday, May 17, 2005

The Twisty Thingy

I was in an autoparts store today, a real symbol of capitalism. It's fully of useful things stuffed in useless packages.

And in between, someone sells something useless to try and make some money, like this one thing by the cash register. It was a completely useless, circularly linked series of semi-circles that a scientist looking guy says, regarding the strange object, "It's a game! It's a puzzle!"

The object has no determinable worth, so I was suckered in to its vibrant colors and inability to be solved. It was like trying to simplify trigonometric identities by only shrinking one side, it's useless and you get nowhere. The thing just twists and twists and twists and makes the same positions over and over again for no reason or cause, and you just keep twisting and twisting forever and ever.

Then I looked at some tire pressure gauge meters. There were two types; the first was a professional looking one, slique and pen-like, and the second had a skull on the end. It reminded me of something someone told me once about selling a product: if you make a product, change something slightly or make it sound like you changed something slightly. Advertise like whatever it is is special.

His example was prescription medicine bottles. If you sell bottles, don't just sell them. Once you need to expand your customer base, make them special some how. Say they do not leech acid into the pills that are supposed to heal you. Then, everyone will think all other medicine bottles leech acid. Now you can go buy a small village somewhere.

The slique one was professional, it had a brand name on it. Brand names really mean nothing, but they pretend they mean something. By existing, a brand name creates something for itself. Brand names are trusted. Brand names are special. The skull one suckers people in. It's not different from the brand name one, but it has a skull on it, so it's cool.

And then I twisited the twisty thingy some more. Maybe if I twist it enough, I'll get somewhere. Maybe I will solve all of my problems in life. Maybe not.

Maybe I should be reading The Sound and the Fury instead of writing about doing things for no reason that lead to nowhere.

Why can't you have any pudding if you don't eat your meat?


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